Mai was twelve when a stranger turned her trust against her.

A man who looked safe.

A child taught to be kind and trusting of elders.

A body that knew something was wrong before her mind could make sense of it.

And then came the silence.

The kind that does not protect you.

The kind that lives in your throat, your gut, your body.

The kind that makes a child hold her breath for a year.

But Mai’s story is not only about what happened to her.

It is about what happens when someone finally tells the truth.

At fifteen, Mai stood in court and spoke about what happened. Not because a verdict would fix everything, but because she needed to be seen, heard, and witnessed.

Years later, she became the first Vietnamese judge in Norway, in the same court where she put her rapist away. 

Full circle.

Asking for Help Is Strength

What moved me about Mai’s story was not just her strength. It was her honesty about needing people outside of her family to help carry what her family could not.

There are moments in life when the people who love us do not have the tools to meet us where we are bleeding. They may be doing the best they can, and still, it is not enough.

That does not always mean they do not love us. Sometimes it means they are simply not equipped with the wisdom to guide us in the pain we are carrying.

Mai reminds us that we are allowed to reach beyond the people who raised us. We are allowed to find the teacher, a friend, the community, a stranger, the earth angel who can hold the truth with us.

Sometimes healing begins when someone outside the original story is finally able to witness it.

This episode is for you if you’ve ever:

• Lived between two cultures
• Stayed silent because speaking felt impossible
• Loved people who loved you but could not give you what you needed
• Carried shame that was never yours to carry
• Had to reach outside your family to find safety, truth, or support

Mai’s wisdom is fierce and compassionate:

Tell your truth.

Let yourself be witnessed.

Be like water.

No mud, no lotus.

Full episode on Don’t Waste Your Pain. Listen now on Apple, Spotify, and YouTube. 

You are not alone. We are all more alike than we are different.